darkened font logo transparent backgroun
  • Brittany Hicks

The Brief Embraces of Satori & Bliss

After a spiritual awakening occurred around six years ago there have been varying moments of intense pain and unresolved trauma being uncovered that call for healing along with moments of intense clarity, love, joy, and bliss. This heart song sings of one of those fleeting and all-consuming moments of bliss that give strength to the Will to heal and know one's self more fully outside of the mental, physical, and emotional boundaries of this experience.

The beautiful waves of bliss that softly embraces those awakening. Moments of fleeting joy that create a sustained sweetness and beauty of life under each moment despite the painful ones. The grace of the divine that softens the heart and the ache of separation that leads to an undertone of thanking each moment for this self-awareness and all that entails from shame to ecstasy. What a wonderful sense that makes you laugh and cry all at the same time. In these moments the realization of how each breath is a miracle and each tear a blessing becomes undeniable. This moment of bliss that was depicted as best as possible in the heart flow of a poem was felt in the middle of a depressed and confused state while the love that is each moment was experienced within it. What a funny little life this is.

My heart breaks open with an unprecedented amount of love that feels so intense it could take the very breath from the lungs. Soft, gentle, flowing, yet piercing, intense, and electric. Heart open wide on the floor as the sweet nectar of life rains in dripping down the cord of every fibrous strain of muscle bathing the self and cells in the light and energy of love. Soft and weeping. Riveting and shaking. Sublime, yet there is still a love so deep for the divine that this would all be surrendered for Divine Will in whatever way it would have me serve.

A craving to love so intensely and fiercely it feels wild and uncanny. The ego pleads to put boundaries on it for a sense of safety and the appearance of sanity. Yet my heart yearns to let each love in my life claim this beauty for its own and be serenaded in the reflection of their beautiful and bountiful essence. Life sweeps the sense of self off its feet, whirling its illusive glimmer of identity in the brisk of a never ending dance of electromagnetic waves of swirling color and light. Light dancing upon light where there is no shadow of self or self just radiant divinity.

What a moment of awe and the ego shock of what the hell is happening! Laughter fills the cells and a smile streams itself upon the face. A glimpse into the empty nature of existence that ironically but romantically relinquishes a notion of nihilism and sings a silent song of Freedom that was never believed before to be anything but a fantasy but through this grace a beginners mind is present that allows for the possibility of this magic like existence/ non- existence to be accepted. A wonderful orchestra between seeming polarities that allow for this temporary experience to be admired, lived, experienced, loved, witnessed.

Poetry in motion standing still until another moment of this wild dance ensues. How I will wait for God in that space until the dance would have me dance again.